Wigging out? This sheitel macher can help with that, too

Cuts both ways

By Tova Ross

Feb. 26, 2010 / 12 Adar 5770

Plenty of sheitel machers (wig makers) set up shop in neighborhoods with burgeoning Orthodox communities, but few can boast a degree in a somewhat related field: marital therapy.

Meet Aviva Rizel, 28, of Bayswater, a woman who wears many hats — or wigs — over the course of her day. Armed with a master's degree in marriage and family therapy, Rizel is a public lecturer on marriage and family issues, and she just started showcasing her own line of sheitels, Aviva's Wigs, in the Cedarhurst hair salon of Aza's Health and Beauty Bar.

"Though I like to throw myself into each job at different times, rather than be sheitel macher and marriage therapist simultaneously, my two world do collide at certain times," admitted Rizel, who was born and raised in Lawrence. "At one time, I walked into a lecture I was speaking at in Queens, and I met one my sheitel customers. We chatted for a bit, and she made room for me to sit next to her. Instead, I went to the front of the room and began lecturing, and her jaw hit the floor!"

Rather than be embarrassed about it, the woman continued to be Rizel's customer.

Lecturing is not always a solo endeavor for Rizel. She and her husband, Meir, the director of men's programming for Shalom Task Force, often speak together and act out various real-life scenarios that are familiar to many couples. It's a job Rizel is particularly well-suited for, with her advanced degree from Hofstra University and acting chops earned at HAFTR High School.

"My husband and I really found an interesting niche, as we both love to act and are experienced with lecturing about anger management and issues facing couples in new marriages," said Rizel. "We take our act on the road, or what we sometimes jokingly call date night, and it has often had interesting results."

For instance, it seems her husband may not be comfortable with Aviva's superior acting ability.

"One time, my husband was acting out the role of a blamer in the marriage, getting really into it, and he's normally such a soft-spoken guy," recalled Rizel. "I channeled the insults being hurled at me into real tears, which left my husband close to tears himself because he thought he had really hurt my feelings. Afterward, he apologized and I told him that it was the best performance yet."

Rizel prefers speaking in neighboring communities since she doesn't, "want to be a public figure in my own backyard." Despite the occasional intersection of her two roles, Rizel said that her twin careers are usually two separate universes, the way she likes it.

"I'm not going to hide my degree or experience with marital therapy, but if it comes up in casual conversation, it comes up," said Rizel. "The joke is that people getting their hair done often use their hairstylists as therapists. But when the women find out I'm an actual therapist, they close up!"

But for those who remain unaware of her background, sheitel appointments are time to speak freely. "When I'm in my role as a sheitel macher, I just listen to people," said Rizel. "I don't like to sneak up on people and do therapy. And sometimes, as a therapist, you have to be mean to make the person realize an essential truth about himself. It's a totally different persona than being a sheitel macher."

Rizel is also the mother of three young children — Shmuel Yehuda, 9 months old, Laya, 3, and Srulie, 5, who is currently in kindergarten at Darchei Torah.

"I'm thrilled to have a store in Cedarhurst, not only because I think it will be a good move for my wig business, but also because my kids' playroom was right next to my stock of wigs, and I would often find Sruli and his friends running around in the sheitels," laughed Rizel.

Next on the agenda for Rizel is an upcoming weekend at a hotel at which she and her husband will be the featured speakers, as well as a potential lecture series in Great Neck. Additionally, she is working towards completing 1,500 hours of supervised counseling so she can obtain her certification as a licensed marital therapist, which means she can open a private practice down the line.

"When I do things, I like to do them 100 percent," Rizel said. "Right now, I'm putting the private therapy practice on the backburner because there are too many other things demanding my attention, but that's the ultimate plan."