A beginner’s Passover compass

By Jamie Geller

Issue of March 26, 2010/ 11 Nissan 5770

Most Jewish cookbooks and Passover articles assume that we all have very special memories of our family’s Passover Seder. They prattle about how all 50 members of your extended family will happily converge in your home, where you will be waiting with a seder meal replete with heirloom recipes and china that’s been handed down from your Great Grand Bubbie from Mezibozh, or some other unpronounceable Old World location.

Puhleeze. What if your family is like so many Jews today? Grandma is from Santa Barbara, and has no treasured recipes. Every year, you decide which friend’s seder to crash, or you go to one of those events sponsored by some well-meaning organization that serves gefilte fish from a jar and matzo that tastes like it was actually baked on the way out of Egypt 3,000 years ago.

This year, you want it to be different. You decided to create a real seder, right in your own home. But your Blackberry is devoid of Passover 911 personnel to help you. Where do you start?

I feel your pain. In fact, the first and only Seder I actually hosted was about two years ago. And guess what? You don’t just stand on a chair and sing the Four Questions. There’s a lot more to it, but I discovered that it’s not as mysterious or complicated as I first thought. The experience rendered valuable tips and strategies that I can share with you.

Creating a meaningful Seder and a memorable holiday takes planning. So let’s talk about the Seder meal, keeping in mind that its purpose is to reinforce the spiritual messages of Passover and create the kind of memories your family will cherish.

First, there is the question of what kind of menu to prepare — exotic or traditional? Personally, I’m all for innovative meals most of the time. But for Passover, I lean toward familiar Jewish fare. One of the mitzvot of the seder is to tell your children the ancient story of the Jews’ exodus from Egypt. I figure that since the object is to hand down this bit of our history from generation to generation, it’s proper for the food accompanying the storytelling to have a similar intergenerational charm.

Classics are called that for a reason: they have withstood the test of time and countless taste buds for generations. There are quintessential Passover dishes that are traditional, such as matzo ball soup, as well as foods that are simply ‘Jewish’, like gefilte fish. These may have no underlying symbolism, meaning, or connection to Passover, but we’ve come to expect them at our Seder. At my seder, I served classic chicken soup, potato kugel cups and brisket in wine sauce because they’re delicious, light and a perfect accompaniment to the Hagadah.

If you want to go for striking new recipes, you have my support and envy for both the search and the find — but the fussing that usually goes along with their preparation can create pressure on you when you least need it. Simple can be delicious and elegant. Remember — we left slavery behind, and that includes the kitchen!

Seder Prep

1. Choose a simple menu

The Seder is a big event in itself. There will be a lot of action at the table. Your menu can be traditional and simple. There is no need to overdo it.

2. Keep it light

Keep in mind that if you’re planning to have a traditional seder experience, reading from the Hagadah and following all the directions to eat and drink at particular junctures, your seder meal should be relatively light. There’s a lot of wine and matzo that precede it (not to mention bitter herbs, and so forth). Moreover, there’s more to the service (and more wine) after the meal; you don’t want to fill everybody up so much that they’ll fall asleep.

3. Choose ‘Do-Ahead’ recipes

Choose recipes that can be made in advance. It is best to do as little cooking as possible the day of the seder. Setting the table, preparing the seder plate, and cooking the food that needs to be made that day will keep you busy enough.

4. Delegate

Nobody likes to show up empty handed. If you’re comfortable with the idea (and your guests understand the level of Passover kashrut in your home), let your guests contribute their favorite dish to the meal. I usually let my guests bring a dessert.

5. Stay focused on the real goal

With all the work demanded of Passover Seder hosts, it is important to stay focused. As important as the matzo balls may be, your guests are more likely to be affected by your mood — and their seder (pre-meal) experience. While preparing for the seder, stay focused on the goal of arriving at the table feeling rested, calm, happy and even full of good humor.

Stay relaxed during the Seder too. Your guests are not food critics there to write an exposé of your menu. Never apologize or critique your own food in front of others — even if it didn’t turn out the way you planned. Just sit back and enjoy the experience of your own seder.

Jamie Geller is the spokesperson for Kosher.com and author of Quick & Kosher: Recipes from the Bride Who Knew Nothing (Feldheim). Residing in Monsey, NY, Jamie also blogs daily at blog.kosher.com and is currently working on her second cookbook.