Meet my brothers and my OHEL Bais Ezra Family

My name is Chaya Wertman. I am fourteen years old and I was born into a family with two extraordinary boys with disabilities. I don’t look at myself as unfortunate, but rather as the fortunate younger sister of two amazing brothers.

An outsider that would walk into my house at any given moment would realize at once that it was anything but typical. However, as a little girl I didn’t think of my family as different, I didn’t know of anything else. As I got older, I realized that my brothers were different and my family was different than my friends’ families. Teachers and therapists were part of our daily routine and arranging our schedule around the therapies was normal.

A family outing was rare and when it did occur the preparations took longer than the actual outing. My brothers’ moods were very unpredictable and what one child enjoyed doing the others didn’t necessarily enjoy. We always had to have contingency plans because one of my brothers could have an unexpected tantrum at any time. And of course, we couldn’t go anywhere without additional help for the boys.

Even though it was very challenging, my parents tried their best giving each child the attention that we needed and doing activities that each child enjoyed. But, by necessity, Eli and Ephraim needed the most attention.

Ephraim’s needs were met through the many res-hab workers that OHEL Bais Ezra sent to keep him occupied. But as Eli grew older and stronger his needs became more demanding. There was no one in the immediate family or extended family that wasn’t affected by Eli’s demanding needs. Anything that I left unattended, Eli would get his hands on. I found that sometimes I couldn’t go out with my parents because Eli couldn’t be left alone and he couldn’t be left with a typical babysitter either. I was probably one of the only girls my age that had to help watch a brother that was 3 years older or do homework with another brother that was 7 years older. Doing homework with Ephraim was part of my daily routine in order to help out while my mom was busy caring for Eli.

As time went on, things started to spiral out of control, even my mother and father had a hard time taking care of Eli because he was so strong and needy.

At that point, the Arlington residence came as a savior for Eli and for our entire family. It was a home that OHEL Bais Ezra opened, that was designed entirely to meet the needs of Eli and four other developmentally disabled boys. It gave Eli a place that was his, where he didn’t have to be contained in one room; there was nothing that he couldn’t touch or could break if he touched, everything was “Eli proof.” There are constant activities that the home provides that Eli enjoys. There’s an incredible staff that gives each boy their undivided attention and constantly keeps the boys occupied with activities that are geared to their individual needs. Eli, along with the other individuals work on life skills daily. Whether it’s cooking in the kitchen, doing the laundry, or even simply throwing out their garbage, each boy strives to achieve his own goals at his own pace.

This home didn’t only make a difference to Eli but it affects me as well as my family daily. We can go on outings without worries of scheduling, tantrums and contingency plans. I can leave things around the house without worrying that Eli could be harmed by them. I now spend more time with my family and friends and my daily routine is closer to that of a typical 14 year old.

At any time that I like I can go and visit Eli. In fact, as part of my weekly schedule I set aside Thursday nights to bake cookies with the boys in the Home. Although Eli is non-verbal, by the smiles on his face whenever I visit, I can ensure that he is happy in his home and being well cared for.

As a family, we can live our daily lives with ease knowing that Eli lives just a few short blocks away, and is part of the extended OHEL Bais Ezra family.