Before the 9 Days, meat-eating ourselves silly, and cooking with gas

So, it was the last day before the Nine Days. You know what that means: Last day to swim, do your laundry and, of course, stuff yourself silly with meat, because for the next nine days you can’t. You can eat it on Shabbat and, of course, if you make a siyum.

More than 30 years ago, Rabbi Hecht organized siyumim on the radio each night of the Nine Days. Each day, the siyum was scheduled from 7 to 7:15 p.m. on two different AM radio stations; on motzaei Shabbat, from 10 to 10:15 p.m. We Jews can be creative when it comes to food.

Last Sunday, my husband and I hosted a bunch of our friends for swimming and a barbecue. I had a busy week, relatives sleeping over for Shabbat and a brunch I had to set up for a client on Sunday morning.

I managed to mix and shape 30 12-ounce burgers, marinate 25 chicken cutlets and 18 steaks, bought the buns, snacks, sauerkraut, all the condiments, prepared a crudités platter, salad, dip, made the “hamburger” cookies for dessert along with two apple pies and chocolate mousse triffle layered with genache.

Not one friend came empty handed — they marched in with ice (Gittlemans) delicious salads (Richters), yummy cooler drinks (Grobs), homemade guacamole, napoleons and a beautiful fruitplate (E&S Finkelstein) and dozens of amazing home baked mandelbread (L&P Finkelstein).

We were all set, or so I thought.

My husband Jerry is in charge of the grill. Don’t get me wrong — he doesn’t actually grill. He was in charge of filling two gas tanks and attaching one of them to the grill. When he attached it a few weeks ago, he marveled at the fact that he attached it. Of course we let my bro in law Jack turn it on to make sure it was attached correctly — and to our surprise, it was. Add gas tank attachments to Jerry’s list of backyard duties including clean up, garbage removal, chair setup and useless toy purchases.

One backyard duty he is still a little rusty in, is the ability to know how to turn off the grill. No, let me correct myself, he knows how to turn off the grill, he actually has to learn to make sure the grill is actually off when he turns it off. Last time we had a barbecue, Dr. Grosser was the guest griller. After we had all eaten I asked Jerry to turn off the grill.

A few hours later, as I walked near the grill, I realized it was burning hot, and all four burners were on sear level heat. It had been shut off already when I asked Jerry to turn it off, so he turned it back on and it was on for another five hours … which brings me back to this past Sunday.

After lounging in the pool and schmoozing, it was time to start the barbecue. Jerry Richter graciously volunteered to barbecue (little did he know he was going to be asked to do it if he didn’t). He turned the gas on and it seemed to be empty — how could that be? Then I realized it was on for an extra five hours the last time we used it when we thought it was off. Jerry proudly fetched the second gas tank he had filled. It started to hiss when it was turned on. He turned it off and tried it again.

Bob Gittleman, also a past guest bbqer at our home, agreed something wasn’t right. By now the entire backyard smelled of the gas that was shooting out of the tank every time it was turned on. My husband said, “Here, let me just turn on the grill. I’m sure it will connect.”

All at once Jerry R and Bob restrained Jerry — had they not we all would have been grilled. Seriously, he would have turned on the grill and the tank would have exploded. Needless to say, Jerry is now banned from all duties relating to the barbecue — though I must admit he is adept at putting the cover back on the grill in an Olympic caliber level.

Thankful that no one blew up, but there was still the problem of how to grill the 40 pounds of meat I had. Since the gas tank was obviously defective, Jerry was going to bring it back to the store. I told him the store was closed but, being the incorrigible optimist, he drove off with the tank into the sunset. In the meantime, it was Joe Grob to the rescue, who drove home, retrieved his tank and had it connected by the time Jerry got back from the CLOSED store.

Phew, we were able to stuff ourselves in prearation for the nine days … when we will all stand on long lines to get into dairy restaurants, including those who would never eat dairy out, nor wait on line.

For those of you who would rather eat at home, here is a super easy recipe that can be made on your grill (if you have a separate grate attachment, or a small portable grill with coals).

Grilled Whole Red Snapper

INGREDIENTS

As many Red Snappers as you will need to serve your guests

Char-Grill seasoning

Lemon pepper

Salt

Soy sauce

Directions:

Cut two slits across both sides of the fish

Sprinkle entire fish with dry ingredients, then brush with soy sauce on both sides.

Grill on medium heat for approximately 15 minutes on each side or till desired internal temperature is reached. If you’re the Richters, it will be rare, actually it will still be swimming. If you’re the Grobs it will be burned beyond recognition (sorry I couldn’t resist).

Wishing all my readers an easy fast and thank you for all your wonderful emails. I really enjoy reading them!

Judy Joszef is a pastry and personal chef as well as a party planner who spent 18 years as a pastry chef at Abigael’s, The Cedar Club, Centro and T42 in the Five Towns, before launching her current business, Soiree. She can be reached at judy.soiree@gmail.com