OU brings the sandwich generation to the table

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“One of the most important things, from a religious and psychological perspective, is to take care of our family. This is what I’m supposed to be doing. That’s what I’m here for, to take care of our own parents and our own children.”

Rabbi Marc Penner, Rav of the Young Israel of Holliswood, addressed the importance of taking care of our parents from a halachic standpoint, the commandment of kibud av v’em, as part of a panel discussion on the “Sandwich Generation”presented by OU Community Services Motzaei Shabbat at the Young Israel of Holliswood. “Look around,” he continued. “Why did G-d put me in this family? And if we have to push aside other things in our life—it’s our job.” He also noted that the Rambam points out in Hilchot Av v’Em that if you can’t take care of your parents yourself you can have others take care of them but “we must take care of the old and the young.”

The panel of two social workers, a physician and director of palliative care, and an eldercare attorney spoke in turns to the beit midrash full of attentive, note-taking, concerned listeners. The 70 men and women who attended received a booklet of information from the OU and a blue packet with literature from MJHS, and other literature including a printed out version of Agudath Israel’s Halachic Medical Directive. “I know you’re here because you’re dealing with these issues,” said Toby Weiss, MSOD, and Director of Cultural Sensitivity and Jewish Programming at Metropolitan Jewish Health Systems.

Some of the key recommendations of the discussion were that it is halachically the responsibility of the adult child to take care of parents, that it is vital to get to know your parent’s doctor before a crisis occurs, that everyone should have a health care proxy, always designate one liaison, one family member to communicate with medical personnel to facilitate communication and be cognizant of HIPA restrictions, and long term care insurance is a good idea. Another point noted that Holocaust survivors should have a separate account for their reparations and that can be arranged through the Claims Conference, from Germany. Survivors are eligible for additional free services and their

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